This story was emailed to me by my best friend who is also a liberal. I know, right? ME of all people, friends with a liberal. I still love her anyway; hate the sin, not the sinner.
(Barbara Risman-CNN) – Credit to Gaslamp Post reader Jennifer, for this story. The “mommy wars” that have cropped up repeatedly this campaign season are a figment of political pundits’ imagination. The most recent example, of course, was the political and media tempest that followed Democratic strategist Hilary Rosen’s comment that Ann Romney, Mitt Romney’s wife and a mother of five, had not “worked a day in her life.” Many made political hay with the remark. Political hay? Rosen was frothing at the mouth and spewing venom. I like how they suddenly changed “the war on women” to “the mommy wars”. You have to watch these guys, America. They love to pull a fast one on you. Read on.
The truth is most women aren’t fighting about this. They know that work is involved to make everyday life happen: the feeding, and clothing and caring for oneself and one’s family, whether earning the money to buy the clothes and food, or being at home, washing those clothes or cooking dinner. All mothers work, nearly all of the time. And so do many fathers. Well Barbara is right, women aren’t fighting about this, but then again, this wasn’t the issue. This was over one group exploiting something for a political agenda, and when one of them went overboard, they want to change the story. This was never about “mommies” until Democratic strategist Hillary Rosen, shot herself in the foot.
But there is a serious issue hidden in the silliness of the alleged mommy wars, and it is the contradictory, conflicting beliefs we have about the value of taking time to care for other people. Taking time to care for other people…. awwwww, doesn’t that sound nice? YOU MEAN TO TELL ME that not everybody values taking care of other people?????????? Who should take care of young people and their grandparents, and how should they be rewarded? We claim to value families, but we don’t really value what it takes to care for them. Let me give you some examples:
Contradiction #1: Everyone seems to agree that women and men should have equal rights. But when was the last time you heard someone say that a man should make fatherhood a “career”? Huh? Mixing and matching your tragedies. It is true today that sometimes, men do become stay-at-home dads, but even in the consciously feminist families I wrote about in my book, “Gender Vertigo,” men share the “work” of raising their children; I didn’t interview one man who described fatherhood as a career. And it took me a long time to find couples that really shared the work equally.
First of all, you damn femenazi, the word “career” isn’t in the vocabulary of most guys. We use the word “job”. We get to work and get the job done. If the kid needs an asswhoopin’, we take care of it. If the kid needs food, we take care of it. If the kid needs clothes and shoes for school, yep, we take care of that too.
Secondly, it’s no secret that moms and dads parent differently; moms tend to nurture, teach patience, and encourage creativity. Dads tend to set boundaries and push kids for results. Dads also encourage risk taking because dads know that if you never try, you never get ahead.
Thirdly, how old were the kids of the parents you supposedly interviewed? There is a HUGE difference between parents of toddlers and parents of teenagers.
There are blogs to help parents equally share the work (like Marc and Amy Vachon’s blog), but if parenting is truly the socially valued career choice that politicians on both sides of the political spectrum claim, why do so few men identify fatherhood as their primary career? Ah ha! She dragged the politicians into it! I told you Barbara, because we don’t use the word “career” to describe what we do. The purse dog carrying, rinky dink, lipsticky, office drone, wanna be broads, do.
Stay at home moms, who have those bitchy friends who put kids off in order to have their careers first, and then throw it in the faces of their stay at home mom, friends, use the word “career” to describe what they do. It’s so that they can feel better about what they do because their friends are bitches. Don’t blame the dads, don’t blame males, blame mom’s uppity bitch friends.
Then again those put off the kids till later broads usually wind up whining that they can’t get pregnant because they waited too long. You can’t have it both ways, ladies.
Contradiction #2: Everyone seems to agree that parenting involves sophisticated emotional and psychological skills and not merely grunt work. But if people truly believe that, why does Stanford sociologist Shelley Correll and her colleagues find time and time again that mothers are discriminated against in hiring and promotions? Related content Sophisticated emotional and psychological skills????? HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAAHAA What is this broad smoking? No parent is perfect, ESPECIALLY a feminist. As a parent, you basically need to do three things; lead by example, be honest with your kids, and know when to put one up the backside of their heads when they need it.
Now, in the case of the moms who face the so-called, discrimination… I’d like to cite numerous examples from another good friend of mine, J9. J9 has told me repeatedly that she may pass over a female candidate for a male one when she hires, because she has a business to run. Moms, in her experience, tend to come in late or leave early because of their kids. Females in todays workplace are a pain in the ass, in her opinion. You can’t push them for results, you can’t give it to them straight (even though many claim that they want honesty), and are more lawsuit prone.
Discrimination? She’s a woman, good luck proving it. At least she’s HONEST.
Here’s another thing to think about; say you have a large order to get on the books, or an important customer that needs your product YESTERDAY. Who are you going to be able to count on, to get it done for the customer? The mom who comes in late or has to leave early because their kid has an appointment or got sick at school, or a guy who is there to get the job done? Logic over emotion, folks, logic over emotion.
And here’s another thing, this broad is citing a SOCIOLOGY PROFESSOR to support her point of view, when it comes to family issues? What’s that old adage again? Those who can, do. Those who can’t…
What’s that word again? It escapes me at the moment.
Contradiction #3: Everyone seems to agree that America supports “family values.” But research published in this month’s American Sociological Review shows that women who breast-feed for six months or more pay a mommy penalty in wages for the rest of their lives because of the lack of work policies that protect employed women’s right to breast-feed on the job. Again, we’re mixing and matching. The two issues have nothing to do with each other, and she’s trying to make the connection between them. Why doesn’t the U.S. institute the same protections for women’s right to breast-feed as other Western industrial countries? Women don’t have the right to breast feed? DAMN THIS CURSED TYRANNY!!!!
Institute protections for women to breastfeed? That has to be the most retarded thing I’ve ever heard. How are you going to strong-arm a proprietor into something like this? The broad who made the kid, made the conscious decision to get knocked up. Maybe some jobs aren’t baby/breast-feeding friendly. EVERYONE knows that you have to conform to the job, not the other way around. It has nothing to do with family values.
If you want a family, then you had better be able to afford one. To put that on someone else is irresponsible and piss poor parenting.
Oh and since we’re on the subject, let’s talk about breastfeeding for a moment, shall we? My mother was a stay at home mom for me and all of my brothers, until we were older. I had mentioned before how poor my parents were when they started; they had two sleeping bags, a clock radio, and a toaster oven.
I occupied a dresser drawer as an infant.
Now to add insult to injury, my parents also helped raise a few of my cousins because a few uncles and aunts needed help. You want to talk about missing out on work experience? Try being a stay at home mom to kids that aren’t even YOURS! Yes, my mom took in strays.
My mom, who reads this blog, has come out of retirement 3 TIMES. She held positions as a plant manager, an executive, as well as a Vice-President of a major electronic parts supplier to the U.S. Government. She had security clearance and had worked all over the country.
She was able to pull this off even AFTER breastfeeding me and my brothers, raising us, raising OTHER PEOPLE’S KIDS, and then went back to work.
Barbara, your argument isn’t just weak, it’s pathetic. Oh wait, “can-do” women like my mother don’t count right? Is THAT why Sarah Palin got such a raw deal from you clowns? Women like that are a threat to your agenda and I’m calling you out on it.
Contradiction #4: Everyone seems to agree that when women married to men of means choose to be stay-at-home moms, they are doing so for the good of their children. But when poor women, without access to first-rate child care, choose to stay home with their babies, we tend to call them lazy welfare mothers. Hang on, let me get my violin. Our social policy of providing only very “temporary assistance to needy families” comes with the built-in insistence that they take personal responsibility for their children, meaning they should get themselves a low-wage job, often with no choice but to leave their children in less than optimal child care. TAKE PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY?!?!?!???!?! OH MY GOD!!!!!
It’s real simple folks; if you can’t afford to feed the kids, then DON’T MAKE THE KIDS… Is she seriously saying that its OUR responsibility to feed the kids that someone else made, but wouldn’t feed? Wouldn’t that lead to rampant abuse of the system, and incentivize single-motherhood, thus destroying the family structure, which has worked for hundreds of thousands of years?
Nah, she’s right…. That would NEVER happen.
Hey America, did you know that rubbers are cheaper than kids?
Sociologist Mirra Komarovsky pointed out these contradictions back in 1953. She argued back then that if society truly believed caretaking was an important and difficult job, nursery school teachers would rate a salary at least equal to the beginning salary of a street cleaner. Apparently Sociologists don’t study microeconomics. Not much has changed since then. Oh brother… As Stephanie Coontz, a historian and co-chair of the Council on Contemporary Families, told me: “It’s time for politicians to stop competing over the women’s votes and start competing over who has the best programs to support all parents, whatever their employment status or their gender.” WHAT???? Which politicians have the best programs to SUPPORT all parents? WHATEVER their employment status or gender????? What the hell kind of red diaper, doper baby, pinko commie bullshit, is THAT?????
Who is going to pay for this? Oh wait, tax the rich, right?
Why all these contradictions? Excellent question! I’ll answer that in just a moment. Because we have a society in flux. We have inherited both workplace cultures and beliefs from a time in our past when successful men had wives to take care of their homes and children. Really? I thought it had more to do with the feminists who wanted an ideal world for irresponsible women to be guilt free, so they used strong-willed communists to help perpetuate them forward (the enemy of my enemy is my friend) but by course of action destroyed the country. Damn those unintended consequences! Workplaces got two employees for the price of one, the husband and his domestic wife. Unions fought for “family wages” so working-class men could benefit from women’s household work as well. Two employees for the price of… WHAT!?!?!?!? UNIONS are the heroes now? Alrighty then, my diagnosis is complete.
That’s not the world we live in today. Now, for better or worse, most mothers of young children — married and single — work both inside and outside their homes. Their workplaces, and our cultural conversation full of contradictions, has lagged far behind.
Let’s call a truce on the fictional mommy wars and start a war on workplaces that don’t allow mommies and daddies to live full lives, on the job and at home. War on the workplace? Them’s COMMUNIST words.
This is one hell of a convoluted brainfuck if I’ve ever read one. First of all, one concept I’d like for all of you to wrap your minds around, is that there is NO SUCH THING AS CONTRADICTION. When one reaches what they believe to be a contradiction, it is because they have failed to correctly assess the situation.
First impressions can be deceiving, can they not? Taking something at face value and using that as your premise for making a decision, and THEN becoming disappointed when the result isn’t what you thought it would be, is ridiculous.
Like my mom used to say, “Use your head, stupid!”
So now where was I? Oh yes, the “mommy wars”. This is absolutely stupid. This is the left leaning media trying to steer attention away from yet another attempt at trying to harvest approval for a failed presidency, AFTER one of their own screwed up.
This didn’t start out as a war on mom, let’s not forget that this all started with Sandra Fluke and her inexplicable, and sudden gripe against the right. What was it all about? She was upset because contraception wasn’t a right.
Do they NOT hand out condoms in highschool now? Not that I agree with it, but it’s the truth.
It was Fluke who testified before congress, that contraceptives were expensive and she had a hard time affording them as a college student. How about that? Kids in college have a hard time affording things! Don’t they all? The gripe was that contraception should be a “right”, and the government (tax-payers) should pay for it. From that, the feminists grabbed the ball and ran with it. It then went from a “right” to contraception to a “right” to birth control.
The right to birth control morphed into a right to have the tax-payers foot the bill for abortions. They had to change the wording of contraception to birth control, in order to make room for the agenda. Well that ticked people off and the “war on women” was born. If you opposed paying for someone else’s abortion, then YOU must hate women. OH MY GOD, the GOP is trying to take our right to get an abortion away!!!
Hang on a second, I’m rolling my eyes.
What happened next? Well a bunch of broads in Virginia got their panties in a wad over a procedure that goes along with an abortion; an ultrasound that requires a wand type transceiver that is inserted into the vagina. This isn’t anything new, in fact when a woman may be pregnant and the doctor cannot find it with the external sensor, they have to use the internal one. This may be necessary in the event that there is an ectopic, or fallopian tubal pregnancy, or in cases where the baby died and they must determine the exact location of the fetus, or in order to confirm that a DNC extraction was successful.
Well those feminists were having NONE OF THAT! They even went as far as to apply for a permit and stage a protest outside of the state capitol. They ended up getting arrested for attempting to storm the capital building in protest. Their problem? That the government was overreaching, and they (the women protesters) wanted the (male) lawmakers, to stay out of their vaginas… It was once again a GOP war against women.
The actual reason that they were arrested was because they left the location where they had the permit to demonstrate, and instead attempted to force their way into the state legislature. It didn’t end well. 31 were arrested.
On a side note, have you ever noticed that alot of the broads that demonstrate for abortion, are broads that you wouldn’t want to see naked in the first place?
Question for the ladies here: If you’re going in for an abortion and they’re going to stick instruments in your vagina (they have to get to the uterus somehow) to kill and remove the baby anyway, what is the big deal with an ultrasound transducers? It’s not like it’s an invasive TSA procedure or something, it is legitimate. Wouldn’t you want the doctor performing the procedure to have as much info as possible? What if you developed an infection or they didn’t get all of the tissue? How could you hope to sue if you voluntarily opted out of the part of the procedure that could have prevented this?
So now we have morphed into legislated “ultrasound rape”. No I’m not kidding, some of those dingbats actually said this. As Bork said in his book, “Slouching Towards Gomorrah,” liberals perpetuate a movement by convincing a group that they’re victims.
All of this was intended to demonize the GOP and whatever candidate from the opposite side of the aisle opposed the president and his fellow Democrats. Why? Because it’s an election year, silly! Since Hilary Rosen’s screw up on national TV, CNN as well as other media outlets have been putting out stories just like this one, and saying that it was the REPUBLICANS that started the whole thing.
Yes, it was the Republicans who made up the term in order to convince people that the Democrats were using it, to distract voters from other economic and social issues that may look bad for the president, or so says Media Matters.
So now we’ve gone from war on women, to war on mommies. It happened right of us, America, it evolved and we all just stared back blankley, thinking “huh????” I watched it, I heard what was said, just the same as all of you. I too caught myself thinking, “but didn’t they just say….?”
You have to watch these guys, America. They LOVE to pull a fast one on you.