Browsing All Posts filed under »You Can’t Make This Crap Up«

Feds Caught Promoting Welfare To Foreigners??????

April 27, 2013

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The United States (World Net Daily) – The U.S. government has been caught promoting the delivery of taxpayer-funded welfare benefits to foreigners, and Judicial Watch’s conclusion is that the Obama administration “cannot be trusted to protect our borders.” Judicial Watch, the Washington watchdog which is known for tracking down and trying to stamp out government […]

Judges: Cop Who Shot Up His Own Patrol Vehicle Can Have Job Back?????

April 26, 2013

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Louisiana (Ramon Antonio Vargas-NOLA.com) – A panel of state appellate court judges voted 2-1 Wednesday to reverse an earlier decision upholding the dismissal of a New Orleans Police Department officer who fired his service weapon numerous times into his personal car while on duty. The main reason is one that by now is familiar for […]

Bill O’Reilly Attacks Alex Jones and Infowars for Daring to Ask Questions About Boston Bomber Narrative

April 21, 2013

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New York (Infowars) – Fox resident blowhard Bill O’Reilly and correspondent Juliet Huddy have attacked Alex Jones and Infowars.com reporter Dan Bidondi. For the two Fox News talking heads it is apparently a serious crime to quiz Massachusetts Gov. Deval Patrick about the false flag attack in Boston on Monday. It is impermissible to call […]

UPDATE: Black Mob Filming Rap Video Attacked Random Victims From Limousine. Media Won’t Comment On Race Of Victims.

April 17, 2013

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UPDATE 4/17/2013 – The four men involved in the beatings have been found guilty and sentenced in connection to the attacks in July of last year.  The update follows the original story below. Originally posted 7/9/2012 Illinois (The Gaslamp Post) – Four men are in custody after a weekend attack on random individuals during the […]

Hazmat Team Called After Naked Man Found Dancing In Street After Crash, Officers Sickened

April 13, 2013

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Florida (Jeff Weiner-Orlando Sentinel) – Several law-enforcement officers were sickened by an apparent chemical exposure Wednesday after authorities arrived to a single-vehicle crash to find the driver dancing naked in the street, according to Orange County Fire Rescue. According to Fire Rescue spokesman John Mulhall, rescuers were called to Via Hacienda Circle near Honour Road […]

It Takes A Special Kind Of Stupid: Police Arrest 63 Gang Members After They Bragged About Shootings, Crimes On Social Media!

April 8, 2013

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New York (The Gaslamp Post) – Police in Manhattan say they now have 63 area gang members who they say are responsible for at least 3 murders, over 30 violent gun-related offenses, and other routine violence since 2009, off the street.  Their reign of terror over a 30-square-block area in East Harlem was declared over […]

Dentist’s Letter To Newspaper Editor Highlights Exaggerated ‘Positives’ Of Fluoridated Water

April 7, 2013

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Oregon (The Gaslamp Post) – The following is a letter to the editor of The Oregonian, in regards to the grossly overstated “positive” effects of fluoridated water on dental health.  Fluoride has long been suspected as a cause of some diseases as well as caused alarm since the discovery of some negative effects on human […]

Bill Would Allow Bookies To Take Bets On Outcomes Of Federal Elections??????

April 5, 2013

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Nevada (AP/RGJ.com) – Who needs political pollsters when Nevada has oddsmakers? A bill introduced Monday in the Nevada Senate would authorize Nevada sports books to take bets on the outcome of federal elections. SB418 introduced by the Senate Judiciary Committee would allow pari-mutuel wagering on elections for president, U.S. Senate and the House of Representatives. […]

Zombie Apocalypse? Crazy Ex-Girlfriend? Crazy Zombie, Ex-Girlfriend, Apocalypse? This Product Has You Covered!

April 2, 2013

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California (The Gaslamp Post) – You promised her your heart, but now she’s come back to hold you to that promise; the problem is that she’s now a zombie.  There will be those who swear that such an occurrence will never happen, but what happens when it not only does, but you haven’t prepared? How […]

UPDATE: White Supremacists Were Planning To Attack City Hall, Preparing For Race War

April 2, 2013

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Update 4/2/2013 – 10 of the 14 individuals arrested in connection with this case have been cleared and their charges dropped.  It is widely speculated that this story may have been contrived by the FBI, making a whole lot of something out of a whole lot of nothing.  The update follows the original story below. […]

Your WTF Story Of The Day: Company Releases New Bacon-Flavored Condoms

March 30, 2013

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Washington (Fox News) Credit to Gaslamp Post reader Ted for this story – I don’t think this what Bill Gates had in mind when he offered $100,000 to someone to invent the next generation condom. Just when you though the bacon fad was fizzling out, J&D’s Foods –the same Seattle-based company that brought us the […]

Oh The IRONY: U.S. Border Patrol Uniforms Made IN MEXICO?!?!?!?!?!?!!

March 25, 2013

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The United States (Elizabeth Harrington-CNS News) – U.S. Customs and Border Protection (CBP) has granted uniform contracts to VF Imagewear, Inc., an apparel company that relies on manufacturing sites in Mexico for a “significant percentage” of its occupational garments. The latest contract with the company was awarded on Dec. 20, 2012, to make “uniform and […]

State Legislature Passes Bill To Keep Innkeeper’s Bedbug Infestations Secret?

March 25, 2013

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Oregon (The Gaslamp Post) – Last Tuesday the Oregon State Senate passed a bill which would permit pest control companies within their state to keep reports of bedbug infestations between them and the state health department.  It also prohibits public open records requests for any such findings at any given business, from the same state […]

Your WTF Story Of The Day: Woman Finds Dead Kitten Inside Of Sausage

March 22, 2013

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No, that’s not a punchline to a dirty joke. Thailand (4029-TV) – A woman in Thailand found the body of a young kitten inside a foot-long sausage while eating dinner with her family. Krod Yotchomrang, 52, told reporters that she bought some sausages from a local market, according to Bangkokpost.com. After consuming some of the […]

Attempting To Kill Snake, Woman Inadvertently Sets Home On Fire

March 22, 2013

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Texas (The Gaslamp Post) – A woman in Texarkana demonstrated for her son why you should not play with fire. Authorities say a woman in northern Texas happened upon a snake while working in the yard.  Intending to kill it, she reportedly retrieved some gasoline and doused the snake with a copious amount of it. […]

Daycare Worker Tied Up Toddler, Took Picture

March 17, 2013

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California (KGO-TV) – Parents at an East Bay preschool are outraged after discovering a former teacher, identified as Angela Calcagno, tied up a 2-year-old girl with masking tape after the girl refused to take a nap. Much to the parents’ dismay, Calcagno even took a picture of the incident. Some parents have already pulled their […]

You Know Your Parental Skills Suck When: 80 Kids Arrested While Drinking At Bar!

March 17, 2013

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Indiana (Jill Disis-IndyStar) – The partylike atmosphere Saturday at the Pancake House had all the fixings of a typical night out on the town: loud music, dancing, scantily clad girls and copious amounts of alcohol. But it wasn’t typical. Instead, Indiana State Excise Police arrested 80 minors — some as young as 13 — in […]

Woman’s Butt Inadvertently Dials 911 During Drug Deal

March 12, 2013

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Oregon (The Gaslamp Post) – You would think that 911 operators have heard it all.  Shows like Cops and reality TV show the play-by-play when the call comes in, the officers show up, the chase, the tackle… *BAM* *BAM* *BAM*”…Sheriff’s office, we have a warrant, open up!!!” Unfortunately none of that actually happened in the […]

Woman Arrested With Meth Hid Pistol In Her Pooter

March 12, 2013

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Oklahoma (The Gaslamp Post) – Police processing two women they had picked up during the wee hours of the morning outside of a closed business found something unexpected on one of – or inside of rather – one of the suspects. Ada police approached a car they had spotted outside of the Dairy Lou and […]

Bet You Didn’t Hear About THIS On The News: Former Rep. Gabby Giffords’ Husband Caught Buying AR-15 “Assault Rifle” ?!?!?!

March 11, 2013

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Arizona (The Gaslamp Post) – Rising stars of the gun-control left, Astronaut Mark Kelly and his wife, former Arizona congresswoman Gabby Giffords have made their voices heard throughout the media as they lobby for what they are calling “common sense” legislation.  On March 4, 2013, Kelly accompanied by his wife testified before state lawmakers in […]

Your Money: Sheriff Still Collecting Pay AFTER Leaving State?

March 9, 2013

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New Mexico (Larry Barker-KRQE-TV) – Sierra County stretches from the White Sands Missile Range in the east to the Gila Wilderness in the west. The 4,000 square miles of rugged southwestern New Mexico includes Truth or Consequences, Elephant Butte Lake and Caballo Lake. But today, one thing Sierra County doesn’t include is its duly-elected sheriff, […]

Former Deputy Sheriffs Sentenced To Prison After Caught In Sting, Shaking Down Drug Dealers.

March 9, 2013

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Arizona (The Gaslamp Post) – A former Pima County sheriff’s deputy was sentenced to 5 years in prison for his part in a conspiracy to shake down drug dealers for money and drugs and then in turn sell them on the street.  In all reality, everything he had stolen was planted by the FBI. Former […]